Saboteur - they had this person on Big Brother last year. They went around and purposely did stuff to mess with the house guests and really wreak havoc. I have decided that I am a saboteur. I am my own worst saboteur. As most of you know - I joined Weight Watchers roughly 5 weeks ago. 1st week I did great! I lost 5 lbs! I was literally dancing in the street (as much as a one legged gimp can dance). It was quiet sexy.
Week 2 - I lost another 2 lbs. Before I knew it I was knocking on the door of a weight that I literally hadn't been in years. Honest. Week 3 - I lost .5 lb. Still not bad. A loss is a loss! YAY Week 4 - I went to the beach with my sister and her kids. I treated myself and didn't do to good on my diet, but because I did so much walking - I wound up losing 1.6 lbs! Amazing.
Week 5 - crash and burn. I tried to get back into the mindset and I tried to eat healthily. Didn't work. My fiance kept telling me that I was blowing it ... and I knew it. I gained 3 lbs.
I am 3/4 through week 6 and it hasn't been pretty. I can't stop myself. WHY? Why can't I? I felt GREAT when I was losing. I felt AWESOME. My blood sugar was under control. I wasn't thirsty all the time. I had SO much more energy, and now I'm blowing it. I've stopped logging my food. I haven't been moving nearly as much. I keep using my foot as a crutch. "My foot really hurts" .... so I can't exercise. But I can do a lot of things that don't involve my foot. I can do this. I am going to do this. Screw this! I am now so mad at myself. Why am I my worst enemy? I don't let people treat me this bad so why do I let myself do it? I totally suck ass.
Ok - it's back on like donkey kong. I am back on track. Don't even ask me if I am ... I am. Believe in me as I believe in myself. I can do this. LET'S GO!
GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWLLLLLLLLL
Bring it!
